At work I would talk to students about the need to make a good first impression. Firm handshake. Well spoken. Well dressed. I thought I had these things down. I love networking, meeting new people, and taking on new tasks. Then I got an email.
Siam and I worked together in LA. He was in a different building than I, but we occasionally worked together. You know those late nights doing things like the Homeless Count. He seemed funny to me. We didn't stay in touch after I moved across the country (again). Then we connected on Facebook. Shared political jokes. He has a fantastic blog I follow.
A few weeks ago he sent me an email. He was going to write about Lyme and I on his blog. He included his first impression of me:
"I didn't get to know Sadie very well but I remember she first came off as a bland and efficient sort of person, but as I got to know her a bit better I could tell that my first impression was wrong and that she was smart and interesting, and possibly annoying."
Guess we all have work to do on our first impressions.....
Siam is a great writer and explores multiple topics, verses just one disease. I especially love his travel reviews. He has quite a way with words, which is why I re-read his Lyme post today. His last line sums it up best (reading his post may help with context):
"Just being a deep down stubborn asshole was enough to get Trapper through in the end. So that's all it takes. Sadie, I know you have that in you."
People tell me all the time to keep positive. Surprisingly, I have done that much more than I expected. Yet, positivity every day seems unnatural. It seems like sweeping real feelings and thoughts under the rug verses owning them.
The past few days have been rough. Sunday was the worst and I didn't move from my couch or bed. I couldn't eat anything. I was in constant pain and struggled to even answer my parents basic questions. Tomorrow I have to go to the hospital for scary tests. Being positive doesn't work on days like this. But being a stubborn asshole will always work for me. So thanks Siam.
No matter how bad things may get Sadie, I absolutely love you as my sister and I admire everything from your style and humor to your strength and fiercenessosis :) in my "fierce" world stubborn assholes can be great! I assume you will continue doing great things in some way!
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